Send Me, I'll Go

"Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me." - Isaiah 6:8

A little over a year ago, a local minister visited the church I was attending and spoke a powerful message about change. She asked a question that made me think, "Are you willing to remain the same to make a change?" I felt a little bad because my mind kept going back to a song that I just couldn't shake, so I missed some of what she said. I know, majority of my blogs have music attached, but that is how I operate. Music is a huge part of my life, it tells my story when I can't, and it gets me through some rough times.

The song I'm referring to, if you haven't figured it out yet, is Send Me by William McDowell. That song has been a song that just touched me since the first time I heard it. I believe iTunes states that I listened to it on my computer alone, about 200 times. That doesn't include the many times I have listened on my phone, Pandora, or even with other people. It is just one of those songs that make you want to get up and do something to make a change.

As I have mentioned in my last blog, my name Teresa Renee means "harvester/reaper reborn." This sermon is what made me think about it the following day. I mentioned that because the song says,"Send me I'll go. I'll go to the nations, so the whole world will know Your love and compassion. The harvest is ready and people are hungry to know You. So send me I'll go."

Sidebar:

In 2007, I went to William Paterson University in Wayne, NJ. While being there, I earned the nickname Sista T, my best friend/sister earned the nickname Sista P and together we earned the nickname "Bible toting choir girls." The reason they called us these things were because we would walk around campus, Bibles in the backpack, prayer in our hearts and a song on our lips. We would have Bible studies any and everywhere, worship sessions in our rooms and with our friends. People would start to ask questions about the Bible and if we didn't know, we would get together and get an answer. We loved doing that and I had no idea that the experience was an extension of who I am, a harvester/reaper.

At William Paterson, the harvest was ready and people were hungry to know God. We were there to tell anyone who would listen to us. I didn't start praying the prayer saying, "Send me, I'll go," until I heard this song some years later. I had no idea that I was already going but I had slacked off once my friend and I left the university.

Back to the blog:

This is funny because the conversation I had with God one day just lined right up with the Bible and I didn't have to read anything else. One day I asked God what my purpose was and He sent me to Jeremiah 1 so I read it and I stopped at verse 5 because that was a familiar verse. I had never read anymore than that one verse before so I stopped and said, "God, I'm in my early 20s and I don't know much. Who is really going to listen to me? I'm shy and I don't speak to people very well." He stopped me and said "keep reading." So I did and I read Jeremiah 6-9. All I could do was laugh because Jeremiah said the same thing I said. After reading, I was still a little confused as to what God wanted me to do so I said "Send me, I'll go."

We all need to get to a point where we can say, "Lord send me, I'll go." Jesus told the disciples that the "gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in all the world for a witness unto all nations." (Matthew 24:14) The apostles were told that they were to be "witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth." (Acts 1:8) Some people call it witnessing, many others call it Evangelism. It really doesn't matter what you call it, what matters is that we are telling people about Christ.

I used Isaiah 6:8 as my opening scripture because I like how Isaiah volunteered to go, he didn't run from his calling like many of us do today. So with that said, I challenge you again. Ask God about your purpose and say "Lord, send me, I'll go." Not only say it, but actually go. I love you all to pieces!!!

Until next time...

Be blessed

Sista T

HELP!!! It's Lookin' Like We're Gonna Make It Through This!!!

So everyone who knows me, knows I love new music. I was recently blessed with Erica Campbell's Help for my birthday. This CD has been on repeat since I got it and two songs are blessing me as we speak. Those two songs are Help and Lookin' Like.

Help is my cry out to God. I have been through so much in my life that if you heard half of my story, you would wonder why I never tried to take myself out. I'm just being honest. Some people would say I'm exaggerating, that I lived a good life, and for the most part, I did. But, what I struggled with internally, not even my family would be able to speak about. I won't go deep at all but I'l share a couple of my struggles that most people can relate to.

I struggle with ignorance, in it's correct context. There is a lot I don't know, and because of that I have way more problems than I need to have. It's not that I don't want to know or that I'm too lazy to find out, I just don't know where to go for what I need. I live my life based on what I know, what I find out and the trial and error of those situations. I could play the blame game and say that other people are to blame for my shortcomings, but I won't because I had just as much responsibility in my life as others did. 

I struggle financially because I don't have certain education or experience to do what I desire. When I try to get the education, I don't have the finances. When I try to get the finances to get the education, I don't have the experience to get the better than minimum wage job. When I try to get the experience, I don't have the education or I have to volunteer which will also cost me for transportation. It's what people around me call Da'struggle. You may hear a lot of people say "Da'struggle is real" and that would be true.

Will I sit around crying, complaining, and looking for handouts? Nope!



Will I give up and throw in the towel? Nope!



Will I cry out to God for help and put my faith into action? Absolutely!!!!!!!



For the past few days I've been running around singing "It's lookin' like, lookin' like, lookin' like, lookin' like I'm gonna make it through this!" This song has been my motivation, my strength when I lost it all. It served as a reminder that I serve a God who is great and mighty and will always have my back. I don't worry anymore and sometimes people get upset because I'm always so happy when I should be upset and crying.  They get upset because I try to make them laugh in the middle of hard times. I act like nothing is wrong and I say to God, "it's in your hands", then I start singing and dancing. Some people just don't understand that I refuse to dwell on my issues and I choose to thank God in advance for the fact that I will make it through my storms. I thank God for trusting me with adversity and allowing me to come out even stronger than I went in.

I issued dare on Facebook back in April. I am going to officially reissue this dare and close out this blog with it. You all have a blessed one!!! You're gonna make it through this!!! Just you wait and see. Here is what I posted:

When going through various storms in life, it's very easy to forget that there is a beautiful rainbow waiting on the other side if you just stay strong and endure everything thrown in your path. It's easy to get upset and take a seat or lash out but I dare you to get so mad that you turn your anger into production.

If you can't find a job, get so mad that you get dressed at 7:30-8am and be knocking on doors by 9 with a resume in hand ready to tell people why they need you.

If you're a writer, write a song, poem, article or something encouraging others and tell your story of how you made it through.

If you're a musician, lay down your emotions through your instrument.

While doing this, thank God for the blessing that will come forth from your storms, heartache, pain and struggles. Believe that He will turn it around for you and your situation will change. Thank Him for the fact that you will never be the same again.

I love you all!!!

Sista T

Performing Lookin' Like at the Howard Theatre April 2, 2014 (I was there thanks to my sis Nicole!!!)